Cheslie Kryst’s Mother, April Simpkins, Reveals Daughter’s Heartbreaking Last Text Message and Secret Battle with Depression
The tragic death of Cheslie Kryst on January 30 sent shockwaves across the globe, leaving many reeling from the loss of a vibrant and accomplished young woman. Cheslie, a former Miss USA, attorney, and Emmy-nominated television correspondent, was just 30 years old when she died by suicide. Months after her passing, her grieving mother, April Simpkins, courageously came forward to share intimate details about her daughter’s final moments and her long, hidden struggle with mental health. In a poignant interview on Red Table Talk, April read aloud the devastating last text message Cheslie sent, offering a raw and unfiltered glimpse into the “crushing weight of persistent sadness” that her daughter could no longer bear.
April Simpkins recounted the morning of January 30, a day that would forever alter her family’s lives. Cheslie, knowing her mother’s Sunday routine, left a simple note in her apartment, expressing her wish for everything to go to April. As April was leaving her exercise class, anticipating a call with Cheslie on her way home, she noticed a text message from her daughter. This message, unbeknownst to her at the time, contained Cheslie’s final, heartbreaking confession.
The Unveiling of a Secret: Cheslie’s Final Words to Her Mother
The text message began with a profound apology: “First, I’m sorry. By the time you get this, I won’t be alive anymore, and it makes me even more sad to write this because I know it will hurt you the most…” April admitted to the hosts Jada Pinkett Smith, Willow Smith, and Adrienne Banfield-Norris that she “basically blacked out” after reading those initial words, the gravity of them too immense to process. However, she later gathered the strength to read the entirety of her daughter’s devastating message, which laid bare a profound struggle hidden beneath a veneer of success and strength.
Cheslie’s text continued, expressing an immeasurable love for her mother, “I love you, mom, and you are my best friend and the person I’ve lived for for years. I wish I could stay with you, but I cannot bear the crushing weight of persistent sadness, hopelessness, and loneliness for any longer.” These words offered a window into the silent suffering of someone who, to the outside world, appeared to have it all. Cheslie revealed the depth of her internal battle, a conflict she had kept private for so long: “I’ve never told you these feelings before because I’ve never wanted you to worry and because I hoped they would eventually change, but I know they never will. They follow me through every accomplishment, success, family gathering, friendly dinner.” This poignant admission highlights the insidious nature of depression, which can persist despite external achievements and social connections.
A Daughter’s Appreciation Amidst Despair
The message further detailed the pervasive nature of her despair, “I cry almost every day now like I’m in mourning. I’ve wished for death for years, and I know you would want to know and want to help. But I haven’t wanted to share this weight with anyone.” It’s a testament to the isolating power of mental illness, where individuals often feel compelled to hide their pain to protect loved ones, fearing they might become a burden. Yet, even in her deepest sorrow, Cheslie acknowledged her mother’s unwavering support, “Regardless of that, thank you sincerely for being there for me in some of my loneliest moments without me even telling you I needed you. You’ve kept me alive and ready to face another day because you answer every phone call, and you’re there for me at the drop of a hat. You listened to me and care when I tell you what goes on in my life, and you’ve always made me feel like you love me.” These lines painted a vivid picture of a mother’s constant, unconditional love, a lifeline that Cheslie held onto for as long as she could.
Her text concluded with a profound declaration of love and a heartbreaking sense of self-blame, which April immediately dismissed: “I love you more than any person I’ve ever known. You’ve done nothing wrong. You’ve done everything right. I no longer feel like I have any purpose in life. I don’t know if I ever really did.” This final expression of love, coupled with the tragic feeling of lacking purpose, underscores the complex and often irrational thoughts that can accompany severe depression. For April, hearing her daughter absolve her of any wrongdoing was a bittersweet comfort amidst unimaginable grief, a clear indication that Cheslie understood her mother’s dedication.
The Final Wishes and A Plea for Peace
April Simpkins briefly skipped over some of Cheslie’s “final wishes” in the text, proceeding to the concluding part of the message. In these final sentences, Cheslie expressed the depth of her isolation and her longing for an end to her suffering. “I’ve pushed away most of my friends, and I can’t fix any of it no matter how hard I’ve tried,” Cheslie wrote. “So I will leave and rejoin God in heaven and hope to find peace there. I don’t want to leave, but I genuinely feel like I have to if I want to escape my loneliness that feels like it has no end. I’ve fought against depression for a long time, but it’s won this time around.” These words poignantly capture the exhaustion and surrender that can come after a prolonged battle with mental illness, revealing a relentless fight that ultimately overwhelmed her. The sense of inescapable loneliness is a common thread for many struggling with depression, even those surrounded by love and support.
Cheslie’s message ended with a heartfelt, public endorsement of her mother’s love: “There aren’t enough words in the world to describe my love and appreciation for you. You are the perfect mom, and I will love you forever. Even in death. Feel free to share this message. People should know that you’re the best mom in the world, and you were the best mom to me that I ever could have hoped for.” This extraordinary permission for her mother to share her last words speaks volumes about Cheslie’s desire for her story, and her mother’s unwavering devotion, to be known and understood, perhaps hoping it could help others.
A Mother’s Agonizing Journey to Understand
April Simpkins and her husband, David Simpkins, Cheslie’s stepdad, received the devastating confirmation of Cheslie’s death while they were at the airport. They were on their way to New York City, desperately trying to understand what was happening with Cheslie after receiving the text. As their plane was about to depart, police confirmed Cheslie had died. April vividly recalled hearing her husband sobbing, a moment of profound heartbreak that no parent should ever endure. They proceeded to New York to claim Cheslie’s body, a somber and unimaginable journey. Just hours before her passing, Cheslie had posted a final, eerily serene message on Instagram, captioned, “May this day bring you rest and peace.” This public message, juxtaposed with the private anguish revealed in her text, underscores the hidden nature of her suffering.
Understanding High-Functioning Depression: The Invisible Battle
April shared a crucial insight into her daughter’s condition, revealing that Cheslie struggled with “high-functioning depression.” This form of depression is particularly challenging to identify because individuals appear successful, engaged, and capable on the surface, often excelling in their professional and personal lives. Yet, beneath this facade, they experience profound sadness, hopelessness, and exhaustion. April admitted, “I knew Cheslie was suffering from depression. I didn’t know the severity of it.” She further disclosed that Cheslie had attempted suicide before, an event that led her to seek professional help with a counselor. However, as is often the case with high-functioning individuals, they possess a remarkable “ability to deflect,” as April put it, masking their true emotional state even from those closest to them.
Cheslie’s accomplishments were truly remarkable. She won the prestigious Miss USA title in 2019, earned a law degree from Wake Forest University, and went on to become an Emmy-nominated correspondent for Extra. These achievements, which would be the highlight of many careers, stood in stark contrast to the internal turmoil she experienced. Her ability to maintain such a successful public persona while grappling with profound sadness serves as a powerful reminder that mental illness does not discriminate and can affect anyone, regardless of their outward success or perceived strength.
Dispelling Misinformation and Seeking Healing
During her candid interview, April Simpkins also took the opportunity to address and firmly put to rest persistent theories suggesting Cheslie was murdered. With a tone of weary finality, she stated, “I know that my daughter died by suicide, and it’s painful to hear people constantly contradicting what we absolutely know. I hope that those who are wanting to continue to muddy her passing with something that just is false will stop and let our family heal.” This plea highlights the additional burden families often face when grieving a public figure, battling misinformation and rumors on top of their profound loss. April’s clarity and firmness underscore the family’s desire for peace and respect as they navigate their grief.
Cheslie Kryst’s Enduring Legacy and the Call for Mental Health Awareness
April Simpkins’ courageous decision to share Cheslie’s last words and her battle with high-functioning depression serves as a vital call for increased mental health awareness and compassion. Cheslie Kryst’s story is a stark reminder that outward appearances can be deceiving and that internal struggles can be profound, even for those who seem to shine the brightest. Her legacy extends beyond her crowns and professional accolades; it now includes a powerful message about the urgent need to destigmatize mental illness, encourage open conversations, and foster environments where individuals feel safe to seek help without shame. The episode of Red Table Talk, which aired Wednesday at 12 p.m. ET on Facebook Watch, brought this critical discussion to a broad audience, emphasizing that empathy and understanding are paramount in supporting those silently battling their inner demons.
Cheslie’s life, though tragically cut short, has sparked a crucial dialogue about mental health, particularly for high-achievers and Black women, who often face unique pressures and societal expectations. Her mother’s bravery in sharing her daughter’s deepest pain ensures that Cheslie’s memory will not only be of a brilliant and beautiful Miss USA but also of a young woman who, through her final poignant message, continues to advocate for greater understanding and support for mental well-being. It is a powerful, if painful, testament to the hidden battles many fight, and a reminder for all to check in on loved ones, not just for what they show, but for what they might be silently enduring.
If you or someone you know needs help, please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255).